Post by readilygrey on Aug 3, 2012 14:35:40 GMT -5
This is for my class submission this week. I am struggling with a title, any help would be great! If there are any errors PLEASE point them out. If I read this draft again my eyes will bleed. Oh, and it can't be any longer, it is the exact length limit for the assignment (it took hours to hack it down to this point!)
Head researcher Nyet’s proboscis was hovering over the shutdown sensor when Inquisitor Chirr propelled himself through the hatch to his work station. He hesitated only a moment before retracting his appendage.
“I’m glad to see you haven’t gone home for the night yet,” Chirr said.
“Can I help you?” Nyet asked.
“A report was brought to my attention concerning one of your researchers,” Chirr took a moment to review his database and Nyet made a silent prayer that the name wasn’t going to be Klek. “Ah, yes, there it is, it’s concerning your researcher, Klek.”
It was only due to years of practice that the chromatophores in Nyet’s skin remained a satiated purple instead of changing to an alarmed orange.
“It seems,” Chirr continued. “That Klek may have contacted an Earthling.”
“He what?” Nyet felt the shift as orange blossomed across his body.
“The details are not known, but a human was found to be in possession of a note.”
Nyet sank back onto his platform. He wondered if he should even bother asking for evidence or simply proceed with arrangements for a reprimand. The latter option would get him home and fed sooner. He was heavy with brood and the idea of food was quite compelling.
“I chose to wait to review the evidence until we could do so together,” Chirr said.
“Wonderful.” Nyet forced some of the flatness from his voice before he continued. “What brought this to your attention, if I may ask?”
“Klek was found showing an image he had taken for personal reasons to one of my whelplings. The existence of the note was discovered in the picture.” Chirr adjusted his database to queue the recording. “May we begin?”
Nyet twisted his proboscis in consent. He arranged himself more comfortably on his platform while Chirr selected play.
“It has been nearly 20,000 years since the last data sample was taken from planet Earth,” Klek’s voice said, its pulse even more grating from the small speaker. “The dominant species, I regret to report, appears to be the humans. I know that previous data had indicated this was likely, but the lack of a return of the great invertebrates is still a personal disappointment.”
Chirr paused the recording. “Are his reports always this subjective?”
“I will talk to him about it,” Nyet said.
Chirr seemed thoughtful, but resumed the recording.
“Location for the sample,” Klek’s voice said, “is a structure dedicated to public meetings. The building specifications are detailed in my attached notes. At present there is a gathering of nineteen adults and twenty-eight immature humans. And no need to worry, Nyet, I made sure that I’m cloaked to avoid detection this time. I won’t let you down again.”
Chirr stopped the tape.
“He has an unusual sense of humor,” Nyet said before Chirr could ask. “Let’s finish listening to the evidence before we discuss it further.” He gestured for Chirr to continue. Chirr’s skin was mostly purple, but with the occasional orange flare. Finally, Chirr’s proboscis made a slight twist and he resumed playing Klek’s report.
“The adults are seated at tables while the smallest of the immature humans are restrained in shell like devices where they are expected to remain silent. Failure to do so will prompt an adult to threaten the offender with a fierce and brightly colored noisemaker. This is shaken at the youth until it is frightened into submission. If this fails the immature human is either forced to ingest a canister of white fluid or suffocated against an adult’s upper body until unconsciousness is achieved.
“I will now move closer so that I can translate the speech of the adults as I am unable to determine the purpose of this meeting from visuals alone.” There was a slosh and a series of suctions as Klek began slowly locomoting toward his destination, neglecting to stop the recording device on his way.
During the long, awkward wait Nyet refused to look at Chirr. Human noises buzzed in the background.
“I’m reading the translation now,” Klek said finally and Nyet was so grateful he would have offered to whelp Klek’s next brood if they weren’t destined to be as hopelessly incompetent as he was. “I have managed to learn that this is a ‘play date.’” There was another, but thankfully shorter pause. “The term confuses me.”
The plates on Chirr’s thorax vibrated in an amused rattle while Nyet look fixedly and pointedly at the screen.
“No males above the age of four are present,” Klek said, lowering his tone. “As of yet their fate is unknown. Since the females make no mention of them, I can only surmise that humans have evolved beyond the need for males other than for reproductive purposes and that they are terminated once this is fulfilled. The conversation is focused primarily on assessing the development and productivity of the immature humans. It seems that, although no longer nomadic, humans are still hunter gatherers. However, there has been a significant change in societal roles in that it is not the women that gather but the children. This shift could indicate a possible move toward pre-industrialization.”
“I thought Earth was industrialized,” Chirr said.
“It is,” Nyet said.
“The resources that humans seek are much smaller than we imagined,” Klek said. “Human females appear to have an affinity for lint, insects, and small round objects. They send their progeny to harvest these items from the floor and under furniture. The females express their gratitude by making loud squawking noises and flailing their appendages. Seemingly content with this form of praise as their only form of compensation, the children return to work.
“I will now approach the gatherers.” Mercifully Chirr chose to skip past this journey.
“One of them can see me,” Klek said.
Chirr’s hue exploded and Nyet himself had never before been so very, vividly orange.
“My cloaking device is still intact, but a small female is speaking to me. I am shutting off this recorder until the danger is under control.” There was an audible fumble followed by a click.
“Now he shuts it off?”Nyet said but Chirr waved him silent.
“She is the only one that is aware of my presence and strangely no one seems to find her interactions, with what must seem an invisible being, to be strange. It seems that as long as they remain productive the young are held to a remarkably low standard of behavior. I—I must go for she is gifting me with a small, irregular object.” There was another click.
“I ran an analysis on the offering and found it to be composed of the same synthetic fibers as the floor covering as well as some discarded human skin. I am disappointed to report that the value of human resources is questionable at best. In addition my new companion is making it difficult to continue observations for, despite my reluctance to squawk and gesture, she does not cease presenting me with gifts. I fear she will bring attention to my presence or that she will be reprimanded for the missing materials, so I am ending my observation now.
“In conclusion, this planet still appears to hold little interest for us as of yet. I recommend returning in another 20,000 years as progress is slow.”
After the recording ended it was a long moment before Chirr or Nyet spoke.
“Despite the many infractions,” Chirr said. “I believe the situation is contained.”
“Never the less, I’m recommending him for reprimand.”
Chirr twisted his proboscis in approval. “The study of Earth needs to be repeated.”
“I will send a new researcher.” Nyet activated the shutdown sensor for his station and followed Chirr through the hatch. “He never mentioned the note in his report, though.”
“No, but it makes sense now.” Chirr opened an image on his database and Nyet moved closer to see it.
An immature Earth female was holding a slip of paper printed with an unfamiliar script. The translation at the bottom read:
Head researcher Nyet’s proboscis was hovering over the shutdown sensor when Inquisitor Chirr propelled himself through the hatch to his work station. He hesitated only a moment before retracting his appendage.
“I’m glad to see you haven’t gone home for the night yet,” Chirr said.
“Can I help you?” Nyet asked.
“A report was brought to my attention concerning one of your researchers,” Chirr took a moment to review his database and Nyet made a silent prayer that the name wasn’t going to be Klek. “Ah, yes, there it is, it’s concerning your researcher, Klek.”
It was only due to years of practice that the chromatophores in Nyet’s skin remained a satiated purple instead of changing to an alarmed orange.
“It seems,” Chirr continued. “That Klek may have contacted an Earthling.”
“He what?” Nyet felt the shift as orange blossomed across his body.
“The details are not known, but a human was found to be in possession of a note.”
Nyet sank back onto his platform. He wondered if he should even bother asking for evidence or simply proceed with arrangements for a reprimand. The latter option would get him home and fed sooner. He was heavy with brood and the idea of food was quite compelling.
“I chose to wait to review the evidence until we could do so together,” Chirr said.
“Wonderful.” Nyet forced some of the flatness from his voice before he continued. “What brought this to your attention, if I may ask?”
“Klek was found showing an image he had taken for personal reasons to one of my whelplings. The existence of the note was discovered in the picture.” Chirr adjusted his database to queue the recording. “May we begin?”
Nyet twisted his proboscis in consent. He arranged himself more comfortably on his platform while Chirr selected play.
“It has been nearly 20,000 years since the last data sample was taken from planet Earth,” Klek’s voice said, its pulse even more grating from the small speaker. “The dominant species, I regret to report, appears to be the humans. I know that previous data had indicated this was likely, but the lack of a return of the great invertebrates is still a personal disappointment.”
Chirr paused the recording. “Are his reports always this subjective?”
“I will talk to him about it,” Nyet said.
Chirr seemed thoughtful, but resumed the recording.
“Location for the sample,” Klek’s voice said, “is a structure dedicated to public meetings. The building specifications are detailed in my attached notes. At present there is a gathering of nineteen adults and twenty-eight immature humans. And no need to worry, Nyet, I made sure that I’m cloaked to avoid detection this time. I won’t let you down again.”
Chirr stopped the tape.
“He has an unusual sense of humor,” Nyet said before Chirr could ask. “Let’s finish listening to the evidence before we discuss it further.” He gestured for Chirr to continue. Chirr’s skin was mostly purple, but with the occasional orange flare. Finally, Chirr’s proboscis made a slight twist and he resumed playing Klek’s report.
“The adults are seated at tables while the smallest of the immature humans are restrained in shell like devices where they are expected to remain silent. Failure to do so will prompt an adult to threaten the offender with a fierce and brightly colored noisemaker. This is shaken at the youth until it is frightened into submission. If this fails the immature human is either forced to ingest a canister of white fluid or suffocated against an adult’s upper body until unconsciousness is achieved.
“I will now move closer so that I can translate the speech of the adults as I am unable to determine the purpose of this meeting from visuals alone.” There was a slosh and a series of suctions as Klek began slowly locomoting toward his destination, neglecting to stop the recording device on his way.
During the long, awkward wait Nyet refused to look at Chirr. Human noises buzzed in the background.
“I’m reading the translation now,” Klek said finally and Nyet was so grateful he would have offered to whelp Klek’s next brood if they weren’t destined to be as hopelessly incompetent as he was. “I have managed to learn that this is a ‘play date.’” There was another, but thankfully shorter pause. “The term confuses me.”
The plates on Chirr’s thorax vibrated in an amused rattle while Nyet look fixedly and pointedly at the screen.
“No males above the age of four are present,” Klek said, lowering his tone. “As of yet their fate is unknown. Since the females make no mention of them, I can only surmise that humans have evolved beyond the need for males other than for reproductive purposes and that they are terminated once this is fulfilled. The conversation is focused primarily on assessing the development and productivity of the immature humans. It seems that, although no longer nomadic, humans are still hunter gatherers. However, there has been a significant change in societal roles in that it is not the women that gather but the children. This shift could indicate a possible move toward pre-industrialization.”
“I thought Earth was industrialized,” Chirr said.
“It is,” Nyet said.
“The resources that humans seek are much smaller than we imagined,” Klek said. “Human females appear to have an affinity for lint, insects, and small round objects. They send their progeny to harvest these items from the floor and under furniture. The females express their gratitude by making loud squawking noises and flailing their appendages. Seemingly content with this form of praise as their only form of compensation, the children return to work.
“I will now approach the gatherers.” Mercifully Chirr chose to skip past this journey.
“One of them can see me,” Klek said.
Chirr’s hue exploded and Nyet himself had never before been so very, vividly orange.
“My cloaking device is still intact, but a small female is speaking to me. I am shutting off this recorder until the danger is under control.” There was an audible fumble followed by a click.
“Now he shuts it off?”Nyet said but Chirr waved him silent.
“She is the only one that is aware of my presence and strangely no one seems to find her interactions, with what must seem an invisible being, to be strange. It seems that as long as they remain productive the young are held to a remarkably low standard of behavior. I—I must go for she is gifting me with a small, irregular object.” There was another click.
“I ran an analysis on the offering and found it to be composed of the same synthetic fibers as the floor covering as well as some discarded human skin. I am disappointed to report that the value of human resources is questionable at best. In addition my new companion is making it difficult to continue observations for, despite my reluctance to squawk and gesture, she does not cease presenting me with gifts. I fear she will bring attention to my presence or that she will be reprimanded for the missing materials, so I am ending my observation now.
“In conclusion, this planet still appears to hold little interest for us as of yet. I recommend returning in another 20,000 years as progress is slow.”
After the recording ended it was a long moment before Chirr or Nyet spoke.
“Despite the many infractions,” Chirr said. “I believe the situation is contained.”
“Never the less, I’m recommending him for reprimand.”
Chirr twisted his proboscis in approval. “The study of Earth needs to be repeated.”
“I will send a new researcher.” Nyet activated the shutdown sensor for his station and followed Chirr through the hatch. “He never mentioned the note in his report, though.”
“No, but it makes sense now.” Chirr opened an image on his database and Nyet moved closer to see it.
An immature Earth female was holding a slip of paper printed with an unfamiliar script. The translation at the bottom read:
So long and thanks for all the lint.